RIGHT OR RIGHTEOUS...THAT'S THE QUESTION

“ I know you think you understand what you thought I said but I'm not sure you realize that what you heard is not what I meant.” I want to thank Lois 'Tootie' Brown for exposing me to the foregoing statement. The very act of her doing so speaks volumes for the importance of hearing everything that's said, and storing it on the shelf if you don't comprehend it at the time. It was about 40 years ago that I read the foregoing statement, on a relatively large, formica cube, ironically located in Mrs. Brown's home on a kitchen shelf , and because I didn't understand it at the time, I shelved it. I just took it down the other day, to plead my case for the paramount importance of truly understanding one another.

In our conversations with each other, we spend such an unwarranted amount of time trying to be 'right', that we don't always get the true gist of what the other person is trying to convey. We so urgently desire for what we're talking about to be understood, that while the other person is speakng we're thinking about what we're going to say next to validate and substantiate what we've already said. Subsequently, our primary objective becomes less about collaborative comprehension, and more about an individualistic pursuit of conversational conquests. 

True understanding comes from 'feeling' rather than 'thinking'. It is by doing so that we are able to gain insight into what is being said, because we have vicariously become the person who's saying it. Where has this person been, where is he/she going, and how can I relate my own life experiences to where this particular individual is right now. These are the sensibilities we have begun to focus on, and have thereby allowed the concepts of empathy, compassion, and genuine concern to become the objectives that are an integral part of our interactions. Then and only then can the question "...Ya feel me?"  be answered in the affirmative.

It's not necessary for us to disregard and forego all of our own thoughts and remarks to listen to another, but the communicative process would be greatly enhanced if our unbiased unconditional attention were given to the person doing the talking. Universal law is based on the premise that we get back what we put out, and we can rest assured that the consideration we give to another, shall be returned to us when it comes time to convey our own  concepts and comments.

That's where I am right now ya'll, working more on righteous understanding and less on being rightly understood. The hope that the things I say are being comprehended is still of major importance, however I want to be able to walk away from every conversation feeling that what I heard the other person say is truly what they meant. You see being right is not nearly as important as being decent and upright, because when you're demonstrating those two attributes of true righteousness... everybody wins. 

You understand what I'm saying? If not, please put it on the shelf for later on.

I'll Holla...


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